Trap
by Crying Faith
Summary: Gabrielle and Xena are heading for India, but there seems to be something Gabrielle wants to talk about before they get there. How will this affect her? How will this affect Xena? X/G R
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own XWP or any characters/storylines associated to the copyrighted material. If the idea of two women together bothers you go read another story.

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Xena and I had just made camp for the evening. We went through the usual routine; she ran off and caught some fish while I started the fire. After she cleaned the fish, I cooked them, and we ate in silence. Once finished I went to wash the frying pan and our plates while she gathered more fire wood for the night. Once we were set for the evening she pulled out her sword and whetstone while I found my scrolls and pens. Once in a while I'd glance up at her. Even though I would bet on Zeus' lightning bolt boxers she was looking over at me, all I'd see was her contently sharpening the blade she carries with her everywhere. And then, like every other time, I'd be trapped. Trapped by the rhythmic grinding of stone and metal. Trapped by the way the shadows of the fire danced across her dark battle worn skin. Trapped by the intensity of ocean deep blue mixed with cold sapphires and the sparkle of the stars that can only be seen in her eyes.

"Xena?" She was being so quite. Like always.

"Yeah?" She never was really all that talkative, but still more open than when we first met.

"Can I ask you something?" I'll never forget when we first met.

"Anything, Gabrielle." Then I was trapped by her smile, the same smile I followed her across Greece and back just to see every now and again.

All those years ago, she was like an answer to my prayers. Strong, just, independent, and defiant to the end. She wasn't searching for fame and fortune, made no mention for any reward she might have been entitled to for saving the girls of our village… for saving me. She wanted nothing. That is why I knew I had to follow her. I could think of no more of a heroic feat than the one she demonstrated that day, and yet, too look in her eyes at that time, I could see she was truly torn, through body, heart, and soul. It showed through her wicked laugh during that first amazing battle, ripping through her with sickly black claws. My father saw it, and was frightened by it.

I was so young then, so naive. I wanted to make any excuse to leave my home for you, so I did. So childish, but determined, none the less. I was determined to show you that even though I was a child, I was strong too in my own ways. Her weapon of choice is her sword. Mine, then, were my words. First on Lila, to comfort her so she would not worry. Then the Cyclops so as not to be eaten. Somehow, I had talked my way to Amphipolis, to her.

I'll always remember the singing women working in the fields, how beautifully their voices carried in the wind. Then I was trapped, by her, as she fought Draco. So graceful, so lethal, so noble, so stunning all I could do was dream of her. Then it happened, the first time she trapped me with her smile, shot across the campfire at me just after I had gathered the courage to go talk to her.

It feels like that was so long ago. Look at us now, Xena.

"Do you think I've changed?" She stopped sharpening her sword but didn't look over. I could feel myself staring at her; I could hear my heart beating just a little bit harder. Suddenly her eyes were on me and I averted my eyes quickly just before locking my gaze on her beautiful blue eyes again, searching for her answer.


	2. Chapter 2

"Of course, isn't that why we're going to India?" That isn't really what I wanted to say, Gabrielle, but it is all I will give as an answer. Has she changed? _Of course_ she has. Not only has she grown over the past years, but our traveling together seems to have made her stronger, more confident. The trials we have faced together have matured her already kindred spirit.

Perhaps this isn't the path I should be leading her on though. Some of the ways she has changed I know are directly because of me. Some of the things that have happened to her, those tragedies and times I have hurt her, could have easily been avoided. This is why I can't tell her, yes, she has changed in so many ways. She has become my guide now. She has become my inspiration, my reason to fight. Her body has become more muscular and lean, voluptuous, elegant, and graceful. Eyes like emeralds glowing in the light of the fire as if expecting me to say more, expecting me to tell her the whole truth, a truth that binds me and traps me, a truth I cannot confess.

If I did, if I told her how not only has she changed but my feelings for her have as well, I'd only be trapping her into this vision I can't shake. This vision she refuses to believe. The true reason we're going to India.

I gave her my best grin, one I reserve only for her.

"Not too often I can get this bard to be quiet." She said nothing, contently scratching away at her scrolls, and then the sweetest of smiles spread onto her face as she looked over at me. Every time this happens I cannot seem to do anything other than sink into the forests of her eyes. Always momentarily, but still long enough to feel like an eternity.

I never thought some young blonde thing would ever have such a hold on me. But she has changed so much. She's not just some young blonde thing anymore. No, she is Gabrielle, Traveling Bard, Queen of the Macedonian Amazons, and it seems that she will be facing even more change. Then, I will be trapped all over again. Xena, Warrior Princess, trapped? Yes; Trapped by her beauty, her graciousness, her compassion; Trapped by things to come, things that will change us both.

Already I have come too close too many times to losing her, and I am trapped by this as well. I cannot let Rome get its filthy hands on her. I will not let Rome take her from me, from the world. India should be safe enough for us; safe enough for her.

Finally we release each other from our gaze, she returns to her scroll, and I return to sharpening my sword, rhythmically going back and forth along the steel. So here we sit at another campfire, another night together, another night of knowing I am trapped.

"Xena?" Damn, she nearly caught me staring again, but calling my name before she looked over gave me just enough time to get my sight focused back on my sword. "Do you think _we've_ changed? You and I?" I nearly dropped my whetstone; however I managed to make it look like I had just paused to consider her question.


End file.
